
Sanity has its limits, It is insanity which is boundless.
Sometimes my mind says throw the mug in the air and try to catch it. It just ignores that the mug is full of coffee. American coffee, not that hot. But still!
Sometimes I just look at the rotating blades of the table fan and think how about I put my fingers between them. What will happen?
Sometimes I just walk to sink of the kitchen and wonder how about I wash my phone. The screen is so dirty.
Sometimes I would look at a girl for more than recommended 3 seconds and wonder what if I ask her out. what will happen if says no and worse still what will happen if she says Yes. How would I deal with it. Sometimes I would look at a girl and wonder what is the purpose of this life, If she is worth it?
Sometimes I would just look at a beautiful girl and wonder what if I punch her in the face. How would she react and at another time I would just look.
Sometimes in the middle of the night I would wake up crying and was told on certain occasions by my friends I laugh eerily while sleeping. I would be happy and sad for no reasons. I would laugh and cry for no apparent cause. I would love to live as many years as humanly possible and sometimes just wonder what if I jump off the bridge I cross each day. (The bridge is just 6 ft in height but you see I am six feet so the observational depth of jumping is 12 ft.)
On the face I would look normal, easy going, soft spoken, straight forward person, on Inside the demons reign my mind. I am an ocean with the buried volcanoes deep inside. I am sometimes God and yet a Monster.
Just tell me If I am losing my sanity or is it normal to feel that way. Just let me know if I am mad or weird or just different?
-SMD
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